it seems kind of strange that i would start this blog now

i mean, i only just found tray's secret blog. why would i find that and then decide to start one of my own?

because i could see how much it helped him
i didnt do the stuff he wrote because he wrote it; he wrote the stuff because i did it
the fact that the stuff he said hurt? that was my fault, not his
and he needed somewhere to talk about it

i dont want him to quit. i want him to have that place to figure out his thoughts without me barging in. id love for him to tell me everything, but theres always going to be some things hed rather figure out on his own. and that is perfectly ok.

ive said that before, and ive thought that before, but seeing how much there really was on the blog made me really understand it. it isnt some luxary im giving him or something that makes me a super outstanding girlfriend or anything; hes owed his thoughts and his privacy when he wants it.

between that and seeing how much all my problems weigh on him, it just made sense that maybe i could use the same thing. there were already thoughts ive known i wouldnt/ couldnt bring up with him for whatever reason, just before they always simply swirled around in my head. maybe it would help to write them down somewhere.

i mean, when i get in certain moods i have to tell SOMEONE. and i dont always want to bug him with that. this way i dont have to.